silence those hurtful, opposing viewpoints
Trey Sanchez | Truth Revolt
We The Internet has perfectly spoofed the widespread cultural fear of hearing different opinions in a fake ad offering headphones that will silence offenders and a body wrap that offers the warmth of self-assurance and protection for anyone that doesn’t have immediate access to trigger warnings or safe spaces.
Here is a transcript of the ad:
The world is a frightening place; filled with new ideas and the opinions of other people. Why live in constant fear of beliefs and interpretations different from your own? There’s a better way.
Now, you can have total piece of mind with the new Alternate Viewpoint-Cancelling Headphones from Insu LTD. (insulted, get it?)
High-quality over-the-ears headphones that filter out any concept you might find disagreeable or uncomfortable…
Earplugs are ugly, expensive, and made by corporations. Alternative Viewpoint-Cancelling Headphones are sleek, affordable, and made by real people.
Order now and get a free upgrade to the Deluxe Well-Being Cocoon. Everywhere can be a safe space when you’re inside. It protects you from offensive speech, disrespectful actions, and aggressive visual stimulation. All while surrounding you in the warmth and comfort that comes from knowing you’re always right — [trigger warning alarm] — uh, I mean correct.
Great for university professors, commencement speakers, student protests, counter-protests, classical Greek mythology, and peer-reviewed scientific journals with conclusions that don’t fit your worldview. Cancel them all!
If you’re not completely satisfied, send it back at no charge to you. You’ll even get this handsome trophy just for trying!
Alternative Viewpoint-Cancelling Headphones from Insu LTD. Because everyone else is wrong.
But if headphones aren’t your style, maybe you need “bully proof windows” or “troll safe doors” offered by the designers at South Park who have constructed a safe space that protects from everyone and everything. Below is the jingle for Cartman’s new digs. It’s South Park, so here is your trigger warning for language. Hurry before Reality crashes the party: